Thursday, September 20, 2012

Pretty Young Thing

Hello, my loves.

I hopped off the blogwagon for a bit, didn't I? I wish I had a better excuse than "well, things got busy," but....things got really stinkin' busy.

So, I feel like I live at my work. No job-developments since last post- none whatsoever, with the exception of a company that kept postponing an interview that they had arranged only to postpone it for a month and send me an email that the position had been filled. Mind you, I hadn't applied for the position. They sought me out on the internet. So. There's that delightful tiddlybit for y'all.
Actually, I suppose the biggest thing that kept me from writing was that damn cold I last posted about- it got pretty nasty, lasted 5-6 weeks.  WEEKS, you guys. In fact, I'm just getting over it and still have the sniffles throughout the day.  I also had to get a chest x-ray. That's right: a fucking x-ray of my lungs. About three weeks ago, in the worst of a cold that I seriously thought I would have *forever*, I decided to go to my local urgent care center and get checked for bronchitis. Mind you, I haven't had or been prone to bronchitis since high school- so I was a bit worried that I was starting back up the old bronchial shit show that I used to be in my youth. So, I went to the urgent care (my fmr. place of employment) and asked the Dr. to give my lungs a listen. Then, my lower right quadrant cracked in the middle of a cough. The Doctor stood back and looked at me with, what I imagined to be, some kind of horror in her eyes. "Caitlin," she said as she grabbed the door knob, "I'm afraid that you might have pneumonia. I'm going to have (the x-ray tech) do some scans."  Then she up and walked out.
How I feel about ever having pneumonia.
I've always heard my mother refer to the "moment that God steps in and douses you in the ice-bath wake up call," but not experienced it until then. The reason is, I'm really, notoriously bad about my health. I put things off and put things off and always assume I'll just bounce back. I had the cough for three weeks, and this time I may have caused myself pneumonia. People die from pneumonia. No bouncing back from mother fucking death, y'all. Granted, it's mostly old people that die from it. But in this story, I'm going to say that I felt the icy, cold hand of the reaper himself.

What I looked like when I was sick, phases one and two. 

Did I have pneumonia? no. I had a viral cough that could only be cured by 'riding it out' and taking a very drowse-inducing cough pill. Which really pissed me off that, for once, I had a sickness that couldn't be done away by taking a z-pack (anti-biotics) or getting a two-second shot. Had to ride that motherfucker like the wind and pray the end was nigh.  The worst part of it was that the drowse-inducing cough pill didn't actually stop the cough. It made it less like a jackhammer was inside my chest, but didn't do much except make me feel like I was having one, continuous out-of-body experience.

This is me, for the last several weeks.

And so, naturally, I decided to steer clear of writing for the masses while recuperating as to avoid....high-posts? I don't know what to call it, but the gibberish coming out of my mouth and mind were barely passable for work.

So, I'm back and I don't know what to write about- I just know that I'm in the middle of training the new girl at work and it is HARD to have to explain every. single. move.  Also, I witnessed a theft-in-progress today at the walgreens. I was in line when I heard the cashier go "Code 3105" or something with a long-ass number, and a manager came bounding by and out the door after this woman. The lady in front of me turned to the cashier and was all : "theft?!" To which the very sassy cashier went: "mmmhmmm baby, that's right." Which of course got "Groove is in the Heart" stuck in my head for the next hour. And now.

Please feel free to party like it's 1990. Because that's when this song came out. 

Then, I decided it was time to stress-eat since my boyfriend is gaming tonight instead of, I don't know, celebrating our 3-year anniversary. Because he kind-of sort-of forgot. Because, you know, facebook didn't remind him. But I'm not mad. It's not like it's our wedding anniversary. I've just banked three years into a relationship and what's another day? I love him today, I'll love him tomorrow. September the 20th. Just another day. 


But in the McDonald's drive-thru I captured the most amazing thing of my day. Ladies and Gentlemen, may I present the creeper-Ronald McDonald?
Wilkinsburg McDonalds should probably trim their hedges. I laughed for 15 minutes. 

I really hope everyone else finds it as funny as I did- it made me forget my general rage towards the world.  Now I'm sitting at home in my jammies, full of junk food that I shouldn't have eaten (thus breaking my diet) and thoroughly intending on giving Rob the stink eye when he gets home. I'll write more later, I'm sure....but it sounds as if my laptop is about to kick the proverbial bucket.


1 comment:

  1. So many things to saaaay!

    2) I am also giving Rob the stink-eye! He cannot forget the 3-year milestone! Flowers are required!
    3) Groove is in the heart.... fuck yes.
    4) Creeper Ronald McD made me laugh, too.
    5) Sorry to hear your cough almost killed you. I am so glad you survived.