-no really, you guys, what the hell? I always heard my parents talk about this stuff when I was little- but I was so, in no way prepared for this one. Student loan bills, car loan bills, insurance bills, rent bills, phone bills (my parents still have me covered on this one), and this list continues. The only remedy I've found for this is singing Destiny's Child. Boom:
Internet friends, you are all welcome.
2. Marriage pressure.
- This one's tough for me because I do love a good wedding, I love surprise proposals, and when my best friend was getting married, I could not pull myself off of TheKnot.com. But, I can wait- I'm in no rush to get married or to get engaged. Would it be nice? Sure. But, financially speaking, I don't have the kind of cash to throw the shindig my loved ones deserve. Nothing cuts me deeper than the amount of times people ask, "when is Rob going to pop the question?" First off, none of your business. Secondly, RUDE. Don't ask me this. It'll happen when it happens. In the meantime, just because I'm 24 doesn't mean I'm an old maid. Oy. This rant actually made me think of this:
Adventures in Babysitting. Oh, man.
3. Having a degree in Journalism, Working in Customer Services.
- I accidentally "herped d' derp" on this whole, planning out my life thing. Man, when my Mom told me "Don't place a period where God places a comma," she was not kidding. I can't tell you how strange and foreign my life feels somedays when I'm at my desk. Working on the back-up plans. Trying to convince God where to put his commas and I fear that he may be laughing at me. Side note: When I think of God, I almost always imagine him to be like this:
Best movie. Ever.
4. All my friends live no where near me.
-No, really. I don't have many people that I consider to be close friends, but those I do all live super far away (or so it feels) now. Brooklyn, China, Seattle, Virginia, Baltimore, and all over. Not cool, friends, move back to Pittsburgh!
Fun fact: My Dad and James Taylor look a LOT alike.
5. Forcing myself to eat right and work out.
-Hence the 20lb weight gain since graduating 3 years ago. This is, admittedly, my own damn fault. It should be easy to put on the ipod and go for a run. To say "no" to McD's and Taco Bell. But I get so sleepy after work I just....make excuses and give up. Will be trying harder to work on this in the long run so I can fit in my size-8s again.
oh, fat bastard.
6. Cleaning my apartment.
-It's an uphill battle to get everything in working, clean order at the same time. Hate the mounds of laundry, the dust, the shoe pile in the doorway, the dishes pile up, and so on. I just hate our building's laundry machines because they are coin operated, almost always being used, and most recently, somebody sent a pen through one of them without cleaning the machine out. Whoops, there goes a few shirts and a pair of pants! Total bummer, you guys.
Oh, Betty Boop. You make it look so easy. Whore.
-I used to be able to drink a little too much and never get hung over. Now, I drink 3 glasses of wine on a full meal and wake up feeling like crap. Also, it's like my metabolism is confused and the minute the bubbly hits my lips I gain 10 pounds. Should probably ix-nay the alcohol. Probably would solve a lot of my problems in the long run. Blogger won't let me attach the "Waking Up in the Hotel" scene from The Hangover. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xlrqaAjBwS4
-Not to be morbid, but, the time is fast approaching when some of my family may not be with me here on Earth. A couple of my Grandparents have dementia/Alzheimer's disease. You don't get much longer after that diagnosis. It really sucks, but they (unfortunately) will not be the first people I'll lose. I've lost so many close to me already and it's not easy but it's a part of life.
Sometimes I avert my eyes and use humor instead....it's easier to deal that way.
9. Disappointing my Parents.
- I admire my Parents for how they raised me, and so, my biggest fear is that I'll do something major and eff it all up. I'm terrified that I will make them look like they did a bad job when they did a FABULOUS job. They are great, loving people. I just wish I could make my moves with ease and without worry that I'll undo some great attribute they've given me that I've yet to see-
Best Parents, Ever.
10. Nothing is Predictable.
-I used to be able to plan my whole day, week, month, year out. School makes it so easy to create goals and set time frames for how things should be and when these things should happen. Then you graduate. Your schedule is work, Monday through Friday, for a set amount of time. Your evenings are for resting since work beat the heck out of you, your weekends are for the chores you haven't done or the workouts you need to do. Maybe you apply for jobs in your field. Maybe you write or go on trips with your friends. There is no set schedule for adulthood; for life. I won't know when my boyfriend will become my fiance, or my fiance to my husband. I won't know when my children will be born; if at all. If they will live full, happy lives or if they will be like some of my friends- a bright, shining light that lasts too short a time. This is adulthood: uncertainty. Nothing like I had imagined and I'm only in its doorway. Shit.
Never put a period where God has put a comma.